Coping With Fertility: Spending Quality Time Together
by Judith Burnett, Ph.D.; Jennifer Kusters, M.S.; Kim McGoff, M.S.; and Ruth Pearl, M.S.
Is spending time together with your partner different for you now that you are coping with fertility issues? Are you spending as much time together as you used to? Or, is all your time together related in some way to your fertility treatments?
Going through fertility treatment can put added stress on a relationship. All too often, couples find they don't have much time for fun together, or even time together at all!
This short questionnaire gives you one way to assess how you are doing together in keeping your relationship healthy, in spite of the stresses you encounter while undergoing fertility treatment. Fill out the form below and compare your answers.
Spending Time Together Assessment:
Ask yourselves what activities you would like to reinstate or increase into your relationship. Determine if you want to try new and exciting things, or whether you prefer spending some more down time together at home.
Describe the positive, nonsexual activities you enjoyed together at the beginning of your relationship.
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Describe the positive, nonsexual activities in your relationship now.
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Take time with your partner to share your answers and see how you can find time to fit these activities into your life.
Spending Time Together Now
If you are like many couples, you've become so busy that you may find yourself wondering how to enjoy leisure time together. To get you started, consider the following suggestions:
- Work out together: Instead of working out by yourself, ask your partner to be your workout buddy. Motivate each other and have fun doing it too.
- Take a walk after dinner: It's a great way to burn off that dinner together while you talk about the day's events.
- Cook dinner together: Try something new or exotic. And don't forget dessert!
- Read a book together and then discuss it: You can read to each other or both read the book separately and then discuss your reactions.
- Go to a movie: Or for that matter, pick out a movie to rent together and bring all the fixings (popcorn, candy, and sodas.)
- Play a board game: This can be hours of fun and interaction/communication is a must!
- Take a class together, like ballroom dancing or maybe a yoga class!
If these suggestions don't seem to work for the two of you, or if you feel you need more support in developing quality time during fertility treatment, Fertility C.A.R.E. offers the its own Fertility C.A.R.E. Support Group as well as the professional counseling services of Judith Burnett, Ph.D., a clinical reproductive psychologist at our center.
